Today we went to a family reunion.... the battle I had last year has made me even more aware of time There was many days last year I worried about what was going to happen to me. I felt the love and support of so many.. I cherish that .. They will never know how that pulled me through.
As I looked around the room I thought about the days when I was a kid and going with my parents . As a kid it is food and fun-- you don't think about how everyone in the room either is married to or shares the blood in my veins . We as kids don't think about a time we won't have some of them around as we age .
Some of them left way too young-- and some I guess just left before we were ready.
I found myself wondering what would they think of me. The women I have become -- the mom I am.
Would they be proud of me- laugh at my short comings.. I don't know but today it was heavy on my heart --what if's
I find myself think about too I was more of an observer as a kid -- I loved watching the people around me... never quite had the self confidence to always join in,
I would love to have a time machine to go back for just a brief visit
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